The Not-Me! Approach to Self Defense
The Not-Me! System will alter your view and frame of reference of self defense. It will reveal why you are able to prevail against a physically advantaged aggressor in a life-threatening situation. The Not-Me! System applies regardless of your physical condition, gender or age. It combines a comprehensive strategy, the interaction between your mind, your body and your emotions with powerful tactics and techniques to maximize your ability to protect yourself.

The Not-Me! System is intended for self protection not fighting. Fighting is mutually agreed upon combat. Fighting may take the form of combat sports such as boxing, kick boxing or mixed martial art matches. Fighting may occur between professional sports players during a competition. Fighting may be a weaponless bar brawl. Fighting has many forms, but what all fights have in common is the following: the participants

willingly engage each other in combat
expect to sustain no or only limited injury
are willing to inflict only limited injury on their opponent
are usually evenly matched physically.

These four points vary greatly from a self-defense situation where at least one participant

does not willingly engage the other in violence
believes that he or she is at risk of serious injury or death
is willing to inflict serious injury or death upon the other
is at some type of disadvantage relative to the other combatant

The Not-Me! System is made up of three major components: Strategy, the Mind Body Emotion Principle, and Tactics & Techniques. The first is a comprehensive strategy that encompasses all phases of self-defense from start to finish. The second draws upon your motivation, emotions, and will to survive. Lastly, there is the use of verbal and physical tactics & techniques to implement the Strategy.

The Not-Me! Strategy Summarized
The purpose of the Not-Me! strategy is to enable you to survive an encounter with a violent aggressor without significant injury. Therefore, you prevail if:

1 the aggressor is deterred from attacking
2 the aggressor disengages his attack
3 you escape from your aggressor
4 others come to your aid
5 your aggressor is unable to carry out his plan and you are not seriously injured.

The strategy is divided into four separate stages; decide, deter, disrupt, & disengage.

The first stage is to decide what injury you are willing and capable causing to another person in order to protect yourself or loved ones from harm. The second stage is to deter your aggressor from attacking by use of your assertive attitude and determine his intent via verbal boundary setting. The third stage is to disrupt your aggressor’s plan, actions, and motivation to do you harm by any means necessary. Finally, upon creating the opportunity to disengage, you escape from your aggressor and seek safety.

The essence of the Not-Me! strategy is to convey to your aggressor through verbal and physical means that he will be injured if he begins or continues his aggression. You replace his motivation to do harm with his greater aversion to pain and injury. You disrupt his plan and create opportunity to escape to safety.

The Mind Body Emotion Principle Summarized

The central theme of the Mind Body Emotion Principle is the division of a person into three interconnected energies of mind mode, physical state of the body, and emotional mode. Each of these energies has multiple states or modes. In order to maximize the effectives of your actions the correct combination of mind mode, physical state, and emotional mode must be used.

The relevant mind modes are conscious, transition, and subconscious. While in conscious mode decision making is self aware and based upon active thinking and reasoning. While in subconscious mode decision making is instinctual and made without conscious thought. While in transitional mode decision making is made by both the conscious and subconscious mind.

The relevant physical states are neutral, adrenaline, fight, and flight. The neutral state is the most common state; the body is neither relaxed or agitated. The adrenalized state occurs as the body becomes charged with adrenaline and is primed for fight or flight, or may be overwhelmed into immobility. During the fight state the body is actively striking, kicking, punching, biting, etc. The flight state is characterized by actions such as running, rolling, crawling, moving away, etc.

The relevant emotional modes are calm/controlled, protective, violent, and escape. The calm/controlled mode occurs when the emotions are neutral and actively controlled by the mind. The protective mode is the desire to avoid harm. The violent mode is characterized by the desire and motivation to physically injury another. The escape mode is defined by the desire and motivation to flee or get away from something or someone.

Applying the Mind Body Emotion Principle to the Not-Me! Strategy creates the following combinations for each level of the strategy:

is executed with the conscious mind mode, the body in neutral state, and with emotions in the calm/controlled mode.

is executed with the transitional mind mode the body in the adrenaline state, and with the emotions in protective mode.

is executed with the subconscious mind mode, the body in fight state, and the emotions in violent mode.

DISENGAGE is executed with the transitional mind mode, the body in flight state, and the emotions in escape mode.

It is only through the correct combination of mind mode, body state, and emotional mode that you will be able to effectively execute the Tactics & Techniques of Not-Me! and prevail against an aggressor with a significant physical advantage. Use of incorrect combinations will result in weak and ineffective actions that will be overwhelmed by your aggressor’s physical superiority.

The Mind Body Emotion Principle defines the necessary mind, body, emotional states and modes to be used during each of the four phases of the Not-Me! strategy.

The Tactics of Not-Me! Summarized

The main elements of the tactics and techniques of Not-Me! are strategic, verbal, and physical. The tactics and techniques are used in conjunction with each state of the Not-Me! strategy of decide, deter, disrupt, disengage. Strategic tactics involve the concepts of realistic training, decision making, confirmation of malicious intent, trigger to act, attacking the attacker, and seeking safety. Verbal tactics involve the use of conflict de-escalation, verbal boundary setting, empowering shouts, and calls for help. Physical tactics involve the use of physical conditioning, body language targeted unexpected, focused explosives strikes (TUFES), and various techniques to cause injury, unconsciousness, and release from holds. The tactics and techniques of Not-Me! are intended to be natural and effective when used with the correct combination of mind mode, physical state, and emotional mode during each stage of the Not-Me strategy.
The specific verbal and physical methods used during each phase of the Not-Me! strategy create the tactics and techniques of Not-Me!




Bangkok, January 2, 2006

A Thai café singer bit off the tongue of an alleged rapist as he tried to attack her in his taxi in the fourth such case of self-defense in Bangkok in 15 months, police said Monday. She walked into the police station “with about an inch of the taxi driver’s tongue," a police official said.



British girl ‘fought off sex attacker’ in Florida hotel lift"
Associated Newspapers Ltd (c) 2005
Police said the girl’s self-defense training helped her escape Carl Moore after he began fondling her and demanding sex. When she screamed, he allegedly grabbed her throat but the girl bit one of his fingers, hit the alarm and fled as the doors open.


DISRUPT with mind is Subconscious, body in Fight mode, and Emotion in Violent mode
KSU Student Fights Off Attacker 9/27/2006
“He grabbed my wrists and told me to get into the car,”she said. ‘I guess it’s just instinct I hit him in the face,’ and he let go.”

DECIDE, DISENGAGE with mind in Transition, body in Flight mode, and Emotion in Escape mode
“I didn’t want to die,” she said. “I twisted the finger, and then he really gave it to me” she said. Her right eye was blacken and swollen shut. Lisk said she has no idea how she did it, but she suddenly found herself running out of the house and across the street to a neighbor, who dialed 911. “I don’t know how I got away,” … “I was so scared.”

© 2007 (Copyright 2007 Not-Me!, Inc. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed.)