Not-Me! Approach to Self Defense
The Not-Me! System will alter your view and frame of reference of self
defense. It will reveal why you are able to prevail against a physically
advantaged aggressor in a life-threatening situation. The Not-Me! System
applies regardless of your physical condition, gender or age. It combines
a comprehensive strategy, the interaction between your mind, your body
and your emotions with powerful tactics and techniques to maximize your
ability to protect yourself.
The Not-Me! System is intended for self protection not fighting.
Fighting is mutually agreed upon combat. Fighting may take the form of
combat sports such as boxing, kick boxing or mixed martial art matches.
Fighting may occur between professional sports players during a competition.
Fighting may be a weaponless bar brawl. Fighting has many forms, but what
all fights have in common is the following: the participants
engage each other in combat
• expect to sustain no or only limited
• are willing to inflict only limited
injury on their opponent
• are usually evenly matched physically.
These four points
vary greatly from a self-defense situation where at least one participant
• does not willingly engage the other in violence
• believes that he or she is at risk
of serious injury or death
• is willing to inflict serious injury
or death upon the other
• is at some type of disadvantage
relative to the other combatant
The Not-Me! System
is made up of three major components: Strategy, the Mind
Body Emotion Principle, and Tactics & Techniques.
The first is a comprehensive strategy that encompasses all phases of self-defense
from start to finish. The second draws upon your motivation, emotions,
and will to survive. Lastly, there is the use of verbal and physical tactics
& techniques to implement the Strategy.
The Not-Me! Strategy Summarized
The purpose of the Not-Me! strategy is to enable you to survive
an encounter with a violent aggressor without significant injury. Therefore,
you prevail if:
1 the aggressor is deterred from attacking
2 the aggressor disengages
3 you escape from your
4 others come to your
5 your aggressor is unable
to carry out his plan and you are not seriously injured.
The strategy is divided into four separate stages; decide, deter, disrupt,
The first stage is to decide what injury you are willing
and capable causing to another person in order to protect yourself or
loved ones from harm. The second stage is to deter your
aggressor from attacking by use of your assertive attitude and determine
his intent via verbal boundary setting. The third stage is to disrupt your aggressor’s plan, actions, and motivation to do you harm by
any means necessary. Finally, upon creating the opportunity to disengage,
you escape from your aggressor and seek safety.
The essence of the Not-Me! strategy is to convey to your aggressor
through verbal and physical means that he will be injured if he begins
or continues his aggression. You replace his motivation to do harm with
his greater aversion to pain and injury. You disrupt his plan and create
opportunity to escape to safety.
The Mind Body Emotion Principle Summarized
The central theme of the Mind Body Emotion Principle is the division of a person into three interconnected energies of mind
mode, physical state of the body, and emotional mode.
Each of these energies has multiple states or modes. In order
to maximize the effectives of your actions the correct combination of
mind mode, physical state, and emotional mode must be
The relevant mind modes are conscious, transition,
and subconscious. While in conscious mode decision making
is self aware and based upon active thinking and reasoning. While in subconscious mode decision making is instinctual and made without conscious thought.
While in transitional mode decision making is made by both the conscious and subconscious mind.
The relevant physical states are neutral, adrenaline,
fight, and flight. The neutral state is the
most common state; the body is neither relaxed or agitated. The adrenalized
state occurs as the body becomes charged with adrenaline and is primed
for fight or flight, or may be overwhelmed into immobility.
During the fight state the body is actively striking, kicking,
punching, biting, etc. The flight state is characterized by actions
such as running, rolling, crawling, moving away, etc.
The relevant emotional modes are calm/controlled,
and escape. The calm/controlled mode occurs when the emotions are neutral and actively controlled by the
mind. The protective mode is the desire to avoid
harm. The violent mode is characterized by the
desire and motivation to physically injury another. The escape
mode is defined by the desire and motivation to flee or get away
from something or someone.
Applying the Mind Body Emotion Principle to
the Not-Me! Strategy creates the following combinations
for each level of the strategy:
DECIDE is executed with the conscious mind mode, the body in
neutral state, and with emotions in the calm/controlled mode.
DETER is executed with the transitional mind mode the body in
the adrenaline state, and with the emotions in protective mode.
DISRUPT is executed with the subconscious mind mode, the body
in fight state, and the emotions in violent mode.
DISENGAGE is executed with the transitional mind mode,
the body in flight state, and the emotions in escape mode.
It is only through the correct combination of mind
mode, body state, and emotional mode that you will be able to effectively execute the Tactics & Techniques
of Not-Me! and prevail against an aggressor with a significant physical
advantage. Use of incorrect combinations will result in weak and ineffective
actions that will be overwhelmed by your aggressor’s physical superiority.
The Mind Body Emotion Principle defines the
necessary mind, body, emotional states and modes to be used during each
of the four phases of the Not-Me! strategy.
The Tactics of Not-Me! Summarized
The main elements of the tactics and techniques of Not-Me! are strategic, verbal, and physical.
The tactics and techniques are used in conjunction
with each state of the Not-Me! strategy of decide, deter, disrupt,
disengage. Strategic tactics involve
the concepts of realistic training, decision making, confirmation of malicious
intent, trigger to act, attacking the attacker,
and seeking safety. Verbal tactics involve the
use of conflict de-escalation, verbal boundary setting,
empowering shouts, and calls for help. Physical tactics involve the use of physical conditioning, body language targeted unexpected,
focused explosives strikes (TUFES), and various techniques to cause injury,
unconsciousness, and release from holds. The tactics
and techniques of Not-Me! are intended to be natural and effective
when used with the correct combination of mind mode,
physical state, and emotional mode during
each stage of the Not-Me strategy.
The specific verbal and physical methods used during each phase of the
Not-Me! strategy create the tactics
and techniques of Not-Me!